UFTBPROJECT FILE
Behind the Txts
Part of the UftB archive
FILE 12 · TEXT-MESSAGE FICTION / COMEDY

Behind the Txts…

Where the imagination and experiences of one man meld with the texts you sent last night.

23original posts · December 2009–November 2010
THE ORIGINAL PREMISE
Anonymous texts were blocks of wet clay. The posts were the sculpting strokes at someone else’s night.
THE RECOVERED FILE

Raw, rambunctious prose born from the previous night’s texts.

Behind the Txts turned real, randomly selected messages from friends and internet strangers into comic vignettes. Everyday events became exaggerated adventures involving beer pong, Taco Bell, Star Wars, racecarting, broken rides, questionable food, and nights that resisted ordinary explanation.

Every surviving post now has its own permanent, indexable article page. Content notes identify mature themes before you read. Entries marked 18+ ask for an adult acknowledgement and do not carry advertising.

COMPLETE ORIGINAL ARCHIVE

All 23 posts

Original titles, dates, copy, and formatting retained · Each entry opens as a dedicated article.

01The Case of the Missing Saturday18+ · Mature themesRead →02I’ve always wanted to use doilies as napkins or Napkin Doilies18+ · Mature themesRead →03The Sites of PorcelainiaMature themesRead →04Complaints Don't Make Good Bait According to Jesus18+ · Mature themesRead →05It's a Queen's Castle After All18+ · Mature themesRead →06It's a Man ThingMature themesRead →07Shakespeare, you bastardMature themesRead →08I like food ttttthhhiiiiissssss muchMature themesRead →09Kanye, you're off the Island.Mature themesRead →10This just in Peter Griffin has a U.T.I.Mature themesRead →11Biggest. Con. Ever18+ · Mature themesRead →12Newsflash: Mortal Kombat 64 < WWE64Mature themesRead →13Ninja.Pirate.Mature themesRead →14Dessert a la Crisco18+ · Mature themesRead →15Of Pongcases and VictoryMature themesRead →16Of Bikes and Broken RidesMature themesRead →17Water Cooler TalkMature themesRead →18Moneyshot the StarsMature themesRead →19New York! New York!Mature themesRead →20Classfied Operation: Cockblocking RobotMature themesRead →21Thank God for TaxisMature themesRead →22Silent Cocoa NighcapRead →23Never 21 AgainMature themesRead →
PROJECT UPDATES

Latest from the file

Release notes, progress reports, major changes, and new material will collect here as this project evolves.

Checking for the latest updates…

01
ARCHIVE UPDATE

Every recovered post now has its own photograph.

All 23 Behind the Txts entries now include a distinct editorial image created for the story it accompanies.

Open update →
STANDING ORDER

The texts started it. The imagination made sure it got out of hand.

← Return to the open archive